Saturday, October 30, 2004

blogging in format

Introduction: one week. extremely eventful.

Presentation. wasn't smooth at first. why did i choose such a difficult product to advertise? But thank God. Lecturers made exceptions for me. It went well. They liked what I had. Anticipating the outcome of my final product. *yeay!*

Turned 21 more gracefully than I expected. It was a great day which started off with candles and happy, smiley faces. Wonderful sms from my mom. Secret Recipe Mud Cake in the afternoon with lotsa people. *A Big thank you goes out to all you wonderful people who find joy in embarassing lil birthday girls with loud singing in the food court during lunch hour* . Went for CG where we berbonding-bonding . I might be a bad influence on my cg leader. lol. A great big hug goes out to my homies - da gurls of A1-0-10, my future room mate, my fav rockstar, rubber band dudes, Peri-Peri, LeoKoo, Lifelesone and my BM pals.

The day after. Emo button turned on. Working on my thesis. Chapter 1 = 2 pages. Not good. Bumming around. Still working on Chapter 1. Dance practice! I'm getting old. Power packed dance. Do you realise that i've got the stamina of a dead duck??? But good workout. *Reminder - eat before working out and cut down on your coffee intake Mel!!!*

Shopping!!!! Great company. Tried on waaaayyy too many dresses and skirts. (Last time I did that was 2 years ago) Best shopping experience since... hrmm.....i dun't remember! I'm all sore now. But gotta keep going!
The Terminal. Cinema nite at A1-0-10. I fell asleep. Nothing new there.

Conclusion: Awesome week. The good and bad happens for a reason. The good sometimes wipes out the bad. But the bad, make you a stronger person.

Monday, October 25, 2004

My momma always said that everyday's a new beginning. A brand new day to a brand new start. Wise that woman is. Jason's status on Psalm 107:29 got me reaching for my bible which hadn't been touched in a long long time. "He stilled the storm to a whisper; the waves of the sea were hushed."
The beating of my troubled heart slowed down to a mild thud, thud thud.
Turning the pages of my Teen Study Bible which is practically falling apart with age, I reach Psalm 42:11 bracketed by me a long time ago. "Why are you downcast, O my soul? Why so disturbed within me? Put your hope in God, for I will yet praise Him, my Savior and my God."
I just spent the whole fucking week on my situational analysis and find out at 1am on Monday morning that it's sorta wrong. And it gets better, my pesentation is tomorrow! Yeay! Way to go Mel!!!

Saturday, October 23, 2004


Friday, October 22, 2004


Isreali artist Emilio Mogilner actually produces his art pieces by holding his breath. This technique is called the "1 breath time". through the course of 1 breath, he lunges desperately with brushes, franctically filling large canvasses with expressionistic gestures and multicoloured representational images. Painting is complete when air runs out...sometimes resulting in loss of consiousness.
What technique do you use?
Heard of the guy who did a huge potrait using toasted bread?
Or puke paint?
hehe.....believe it!

Thursday, October 21, 2004

Impatiently I wait
For death to come knocking
For darkness to envelope my whole being
To be rid of feeling
To be out of this pool i'm drowning
Should death be aided
I think not.
I'm here
What's taking you so long....

Wednesday, October 20, 2004

A. D. D

Grrrr i hate doing this stewpid thesis and this situation analysis crap. Its driving me bonkers! I feel so mentally drained. This stuff is supposed to be easy for me! All i need to do is research then write!!! But i feel like my mind's put on hold. I can't seem to concentrate. All i manage every hour or so is TWO paragraphs and then i'm *poof* a million miles away.
It's strange but i think i have attention deficit disorder. I was lying down getting ready for bed then suddenly felt like i wanted to use my soap dispenser. So i get up and rummaged thru my cupboard so i can find my soap dispenser which i've had for one and a half years but never used then filled it up with soap.
And then I was about to go make a cup of coffee but somehow i ended up in my room sorting through my laundry.
And now, i'm supposed to be looking for MAOIs (Monoamine Oxidase Inhibitor) but goodness knows how i ended up in here.

Monday, October 18, 2004


What I Love bout Home:
  • I get to drink my favourite Pat Poh peng at every coffee shop I go to.
  • Food is cheap so I get to order more than one dish and miraculously, I manage to finish it too!!
  • I get endless hugs from my family.
  • I get to cuddle my dog, Lady.
  • Using the toilet with the door open.
  • Walking around the house with a KIKO shirt.
  • Astro
  • DVD's!!!!!
  • My grandma's coffee
  • My mom's Milo moments. (us gathering in the kitchen just before bedtime giggling bout everything over a cup of milo)
  • The feeling of never being alone.

*list not in any paticular order.

I just got back to Cyber and I miss BM already. I won't be going back till Christmas, so all those hugs and kisses better keep me sustained till then!

Wednesday, October 13, 2004

Band-Aid me

saw you
met you
need you
dream you
find you
lose you
love you

see me
use me
lose me
love me
find me
smash me
band-aid me
erase me.

Sunday, October 10, 2004

in pain

Seems like a never ending episode of aches and pains!!!!
I've been having headache's every day for the past 3 weeks and its driving me nutz!!!
And now after cg v cg (CFMMU's version of Amazing Race) i've hurt my back again and now i'm REALLY REALLY in pain. Sport injuries don't ever heal properly and i need a miracle for my back to be straightened out again. Right now I cant sit for long, I can't stand for long, heck I cant even sleep in one position for long!!!
Please pray with me that it will get better soon.

Friday, October 08, 2004

October 4:
Stefanie Khaw if you're still reading, Happy Birthday beb!!!!
October 7:
Happy Birthday Nicky and Beckyz!!!!
October 8:
Happy Birthday Purdey!!!!!!!
*muacks!* Wishing you guys many many more fantabulous days ahead of you~

Off to get ready for my Italian Date~!~!~ weehooo!

Wednesday, October 06, 2004

Human scum

You know how we always classify people as being a certain 'kind', like owhh that group of girls are what you call 'bimbos' and those are the melancholic type of people, on your far right are the self-righteous ones, these here are real bad...they smoke and drink and do drugs openly. And that group of peole...demn and them over there they're sleeping with each other. Then you have the metros and gays, goodness knows what they're up to.
Have you ever been guilty of 'labeling' people. I know I have.
If aliens existed they'd be like "Urghh Human Scum. You're poluting our milky way."
"Me? nonono...I havent even been to space. It's those space invaders who want to conquer all!!!"
"Shesshhh.....dua kali lima, lima kali dua. Die mofos dieeeeeeeeeeee."
And there goes the human race.
The end.

Tuesday, October 05, 2004

what's important?

Just sitting down and wondering what are my priorities in life. DO i place importance in the things that matter most? or do those things get left unnoticed...untouched.
Trivial things like missing CF or not participating in CF activities nag at me from time to time? Shud i place importance in that or my work which is ever increasing? If i missed CF cause i was busy consoling a friend who was down in the dumps, did i do right? Some would think not.
I got irked at a friend today. But all he did was pray. That God would 'provide friends to be with me when I'm lonely, to help me not always feel down and alone' I should be touched at such a prayer but why da heck was i so irritated. I was touched to a certain extent. Maybe i was just being picky as to who I wanted to 'be with me when i felt alone'. Maybe i felt like my 'friend' didnt wanna do the job of keeping me company so he was praying that someone else would.
Silly i know. So why do people get irked at the humbleest of prayers. Are our prayers really all that sincere. I know sometimes mine aren't. We say what people want us to say or what people want to hear....
There are so many self righteous people out there you know.....I might be one sometimes. Am i really showing God's love to people i meet or am i just like the girls in Saved?
Drifting thoughts. I'm ok in this place i'm in right now. Happy that i've left behind my drunken nights, smoky times and and weed whacking moments. The only high i get now is from the Lord. Maybe i'm just starting to get used to the idea that life's not all up and down moments. That's lots going on in between. Parts where ure not supposed to fit in but you're just supposed to walk through, look-see, touch a little and move on.
To that friend...I now appreciate your prayer.

Friday, October 01, 2004

Misunderstood....owh well....
final year....blerghh
Getting older.....can i stay 20 like forever???
Friends..... ummm what? who? where?
God..... right. Mine~

Ask not about the emotions I go through... Do i need an explanation for all that I do?

Weirdos who post childish comments on my tag board.....get a life dude!