Thursday, October 27, 2005

NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!
NOT another year!!!!!! God we had a deal!!!! I turn 20 and we stop counting! *sulk*

Looking forward to my holiday back in Penang. Sure hope the weather's way better than it is here. I wanna head to the beach!!!
I sooo need a holiday!

Wednesday, October 26, 2005

I wish I had what I need
To be on my own
'Cause I feel so defeated
And I'm feeling alone

And it all seems so helpless
And I have no plans
I'm a plane in the sunset
With nowhere to land

And all I see
It could never make me happy And all my sand castles
Spend their time collapsing

Let me know that You hear me
Let me know Your touch
Let me know that You love me
Let that be enough

It's my birthday tomorrow
No one here could know
I was born this Thursday
22 years ago

And I feel stuck
Watching history repeating
Yeah, who am I?
Just a kid who knows he's needy

Let me know that You hear me
Let me know Your touch
Let me know that You love me
And let that be enough

Switchfoot - Let That Be Enough

Tuesday, October 25, 2005

dumb questions...

Was bored too. Hey Na, its gonna be somewhat similar to yours la. And yea i'm not really into these kinda things. But...*shrug*
:D

THREE NAMES YOU GO BY:
1. Mel
2. Melisa
3. Lisa

THREE SCREEN NAMES YOU HAVE HAD:
1. hoyden
2. Asi|eM
3. higgledy-piggledy

THREE PHYSICAL THINGS YOU LIKE ABOUT YOURSELF:
1. Eyes
2. height
3. dats it.

THREE PHYSICAL THINGS YOU DON'T LIKE ABOUT YOURSELF:
1. dark rings which mever seem to go away!
2. that's all that's bothering me right now. :p

THREE THINGS THAT SCARE YOU:
1. waking up to find that all you've believed in your entire life is a lie.
2. being in a big house all alone
3. Hurting someone you love

THREE OF YOUR EVERYDAY ESSENTIALS:
1. a shower!
2. hugs
3. Music

THREE THINGS YOU ARE WEARING RIGHT NOW:
1. jeans
2. flip-flops
3. knit top

THREE OF YOUR FAVORITE BANDS OR MUSICAL ARTISTS:
1. Explosions In The Sky
2. Plumb
3. Switchfoot

THREE OF YOUR FAVORITE SONGS:
1. Your Hand In Mine - Explosions In The Sky
2. Wonderwall - Ryan Adams
3. Best Of You - Foo Fighters

THREE THINGS YOU WANT IN A RELATIONSHIP:
1. honesty and trust
2. humour and excitement
3. endless conversations

2 TRUTHS 1 LIE:
1. i love coffee
2. i love The OC
3. I don't lie

THREE PHYSICAL THINGS ABOUT THE PREFERRED SEX THAT APPEAL TO YOU:
1. Eyes
2. Arms
3. Hair

THREE OF YOUR FAVORITE HOBBIES:
1. Reading
2. Doodling
3. Journaling

THREE THINGS YOU WANT TO DO REALLY BADLY RIGHT NOW:
1. Head over to the beach with friends.
2. Re-live the 'run in the rain'
3. get the hell out of KL

THREE CAREERS YOU'RE CONSIDERING/YOU'VE CONSIDERED:
1. Art Therapist
2. Designer
3. Journalist

THREE PLACES YOU WANT TO GO ON VACATION:
1. Pacific Islands (there's over 20,000 of 'em so good luck Mel!)
2. Europe
3. Africa

THREE THINGS YOU WANT TO DO BEFORE YOU DIE:
1. Visit the whole of south East Asia.
2. Bungee Jumping
3. White water rafting

THREE WAYS THAT YOU ARE STEREOTYPICALLY A BOY:
1. Ego-istic.
2. I understand guy-talk
3. Mel Macho (haha)

THREE WAYS THAT YOU ARE STEREOTYPICALLY A GIRL:
1. I'm indecisive
2. I beat round the bush.
3. PMS-y

THREE MALE CELEB CRUSHES:
1. Adam Brody (The OC)
2. John Rzeznik (Goo Goo Dolls)
3. Reynaldo Gianecchini (Brazilian model/actor - *Drool*)

THREE PEOPLE THAT I WOULD LIKE TO SEE TAKE THIS QUIZ NOW:
Erm.
1. Melissa
2. Joanne Low
3. Felicia

Monday, October 24, 2005

E . M . O

With all the talk about emo-ism , here's a post dedicated to just the word emo
I hear its started a new culture. It's the new craze! Being emo is now a fad. SO go out and get yourself an 'emo' today!

Check out this site which actually gives you 696 definitions of the word Emo.
Urban Dictionary
My favourite's number 4.

Thursday, October 20, 2005

band-aid me...

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Wednesday, October 19, 2005

dazed...

A friend once told me that he gets frustrated when he can't figure people out. He doesn't understand why they act a certain way or why they say certain things. I answered by saying that people are complex beings and maybe you're not supposed to try and figure them out but just accept them and learn to live with watever characteristics they carry.
But what happens when you can't figure yourself out? I mean aren't you supposed to be the one who know's you the best. SO what happens when you fail to understand yourself?
I just realised today that i've been living in a daze. I drive to work in a daze and arrive at work miraculously cause I don't even remember the routes i took to get there. And when i'm home i've no idea wat i'm doing cause when I snap out of my state of neither-here-nor-there, it's bed time and i've gotta wake up to another day of the same shit.I don't even remember what I did on my off days! And I'm getting grilled at work cause I keep spacing-out and making stupid mistakes!
What happens when the same thoughts go through your head day after day? It gets boring, tiring and fkin annoying cause it just won't go away! These thoughts which I thought i've dealt with before. Which I thought i'd gotten over or put behind me. They keep popping up! How annoying is that?! I can't figure out where they come from. I can't figure out why i'm in this 'in-between' place.
I think I talk too much, expect too much, give too much, care too much, Complain too much and have always got some shit or another happening to me which makes me feel like i'm just jinxed or someone up there must really hate me.Hehh.
It's weird how when you don't share what's going on in your mind, you end up having your frustrations and dissapointments pent up and risk having them explode inwardly. But if you do share, you risk being labeled emo or just twisted or really messed-up and then have people say they're 'tired' of hearing you out. Which pretty much leaves you frustrated and dissapinted all over again which you than shud just shut up about and take it out on yourself. AT least that's what I think sometimes.

Monday, October 17, 2005

I know that i'll do it tonight
I can't explain why i must
Its just a strong urge from within
I glide it across the tanned surface,
there is no pain
Scarlet drops are all i gain
This addiction I cannot tame
Momentary loss of emotional pain
It always returns and i'm trapped again.
In need of a new begining.
Or a definite end.

Sunday, October 16, 2005

@%$#@#$
I REALLY need to move outta here.

Saturday, October 15, 2005

I soooo need a vacation.
sick-ed
pukey
no more Dominos for me.

dumb-fucks patroling my mind.
need a change...

Wednesday, October 12, 2005

Sometimes emotional pain supersedes physical pain. And sometimes, you just blead to death...
There are some people who are just blessed and it seems like good things always happen to them. And then there are some of which good stuff almost always never happen. I think I fall in the second category. Or well at least I thought i did till Nicky came by and showed me otherwise.
I mean despite being alone in that big house, and having my car and then my computer die on me and on top of that having to fork out 90 bucks on top of the 1500 to pay for parking tickets and car repairs, I managed to have a good weekend with Cyber peeps on Friday right through to Sunday!
And best of all, my trip to town with Nicky yesterday was just awesome!! We spent the entire afternoon just browsing through Borders and having coffee at Starbucks with DELICIOUS pau's from Baoz and bread from Bread History. That's the life. My ideal day out. I would say, the best thing that's happened to me in the past couple of months would be having Nicky back from Subang! I sureeee did miss u loads man! Owhh and having friends who'd always call you out for dinner or to just chill. You guys are amazing. I lurveee you BM girls too!!!! Wouldn't have had managed to stand up if not for you girls. *hugz*

Tuesday, October 11, 2005

I think you really are a jerk :p
But owhh well.... time for some good news....err.... wait...i knew I had some.....
umm..... nope none at the moment. hehh.

Monday, October 10, 2005

greater than bombs...

This was written by my godmother last week:

My dearest Family,

Our lives would have been changed yesterday 1st Oct if not for the hand of God. I write now to share with you a powerful testimony that the lord has impressed on my heart to share. On Friday Dave and Sofi left for Bali. They had gone there to celebrate Sofi’s birthday which is today. Yesterday evening after their dinner, they were strolling through the Kuta Beach area and Dave spotted a pair of flip flops which he wanted to buy. The Lord intervened and made Sofi take Dave from that shopping center to the one across the street. Two minutes after they left the square, the bombs went off and had they not walked away, they would have been in the center of it all.

We managed to speak to him and both he and Sofi are shaken by the experience. They saw the injured and other victims right behind them and they know that it was the Lord’s hedge of protection that has brought them through unscathed.

Love,
Babs


Psalm 91 is like the most recited Psalm in our family. It was introduced to my mom back in 1990 when my sister was born. Here's what my mom replied:

Hi everyone,

Well Babs testimony is indeed powerful. I called Dave too, and felt so happy to just hear his voice. You are all so very precious to me.Dan do you remember when you introduced me to Pslam 91? It was 24 Dec 1990, Jess had been born, on the 22nd but she became ill and could not retain anything, they had done a stomach wash, but it did not help. Dad was in Mervin's house with you Dan preparing for Xmas, Mum had left us on Sep11 that year. Lourdes called Dad and you all came rushing down to the hospital. I remember Dan asking the nurse to bring Jess to the bed, and she argued with Dan, because she was going to do another stomach wash on Jess. We made a circle around her and we prayed and we ended with Pslam 91.Dan told me to take her home for Xmas and I did against the doctor's advice and Jess was fine! That psalm is a must for us ever since and I can tell you so many signs and miracles we saw in our daily lives just because we believed in the power of God's word.

Love,
Lynn


Psalm 91: "....If you make the Most High your dwelling-even the Lord who is my refuge-Then no harm will befall you, no disaster will come near your tent. For He will command His angles concerning you to guard you in all your ways; they will lift you up in their hands, so that you will not strike your foot against a stone..."

This is to encourage all of you that we serve a true and living God. He neither slumbers nor sleeps and watches over us every minute of each day.
Be blessed~

Thursday, October 06, 2005

He said...

“You can’t see ahead, but that’s okay, because you can see Me.” - God
WTF?
confused.
hurt.
don't know where I stand.

Monday, October 03, 2005

she stares at her entry.
haha. dumb. It's dumb.

The Accidentals - Ali Smith
Totally whacky. Well more like really peculiar and demented in a way.
She'll review it tomorrow. Sleep....escape. end.

fine

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Its the feeling you get when you have so much you wanna say but You don't know how to say it. You fear that it might come out all wrong. Or maybe I don't really have anything to say but I just have the constant need to type or talk.
Or maybe what I wanna say should be said directly to you and not in here.
Who's you?
Come to think of it, there's so many 'you's so who am I actually talking about? Talking to.
This book is messing up my head. These chapters are meaningless. I should write my own story. But I can't do it. Alone.
Aloof. You are. Baffling. Fine.
Whatever.
She's an island.

1:14 : Logged Out.