Thursday, August 31, 2006

Saya anak Malaysia~!

Its independence day!!!
Woohoo~! 49 years man!
Yes i'm proud to be Malaysian!
I might not drive around with a flag on my car.
But that doesn't make me love my country any less. :p



We did freezes and sang 'Negaraku' while on a hand stand. Who needs fireworks when you've got wacky friends. :D
Owh and i finally had my milo-pisang shake.
*grin*

Tuesday, August 29, 2006

randoms.

The test of silence.
Here's where i zip and hope i don't get figured out.
But yeah you've figured me out.
strangely though.... i don't mind.
Don't mind at all.

Unplug my lachrymal.
Gee.... i'm beginning to love the high walls and the stoic front.
I fear i'm getting used to all this distance.
I miss the white empty spaces.

Everyone falls, save the few that fly.
Of all that's going on... I'll fold.
Don't want in on this game.
I'd like to just be __.

Disconnected.
Totally my fault.
I'm staying away.
I'm sorry. We've just been on different wavelengths the whole time.
And i just couldn't care less.

My Precious...i got your message.
I'm sorry for my unbelief.
You never did leave.
Still holding on to You.
Thank You.
re.newed.re.freshed

Friday, August 25, 2006

this ain't fun

in pain.
blehh.
this sucks.
I've gotta lay off for like a few weeks!
%#%@*$^%$
*sigh...*

Thursday, August 24, 2006

visions

Over the past few weeks, i find myself being constantly challenged. In what areas exactly i shall not say. But it's been somewhat refreshing when you get friends who are able to come up to you and just speak words of affirmation or even have friends rebuke you about a certain attitudes or mindset.

I think i'm pretty hard headed and more than often i fail to listen and see things although the answers are right in front of me. I ask for answers yet refuse the accept them. I pray and ask God for answers and directions and He has indeed answered. His answers are for right NOW, but I keep looking for answers which are for situations down the road.
Me and my "what if's?"

I was talking to a friend today, and he was talking about Helen Keller, who was asked the question "What's worse than being born blind?" Her reply was "Having sight without vision"
What is vision?
...dreams? the future? hope?

God said to Abraham when he showed him the promised land, "What you see if what you've got!" (not in those words exactly)
But i suppose it ain't only bout seeing with our physical eyes but seeing with our Spiritual eyes as well!

I keep asking myself how do we know if our vision is in line with God's vision? I don't know that answer just yet. But i do know that "God is greatly complimented when we envision, what He envisions for us" And well it doesnt get any clearer than this : Prov 3:5-6 Lean not on your own wisdom but seek the Lord in all you do and He will direct your paths.

I hung out with The Rock Star yesterday. He's been through his share of a series of unfortunate events. But he was still joyful, and thankful, for no matter how bad the situation seemed, it could have been worse. And as we got to talking he said that sometimes God allows you to go through rough times. Painful times even. But it aint cause He's got a sick sense of humor. He's preparing you for something greater.

Like if you pray for patience, He'll bring along a really difficult person to deal with. Or if you've been praying for total dependence on God, He'll take you away from your comfort zone, He'll put you in a place where you've got no choice but to be totally dependant on Him.

I've got the answers i was praying for. It might not be the answers i was lookin for, but they're answers no doubt. And it IS far better to be walking in Gods way than my own. I'd be just standing in the glare of everything looking like a blindfolded child swinging a bat at a paper donkey.

Yesterday, i was reminded about the parable of the talents (Matthew 25:14 - 30) We're supposed to do something with what's been given to us. Like the guy who was given five talents and he put it to work and gained five more! I love the reply of the master when he saw what his servant had achieved: "Well done, good and faithful servant! You have been faithful with a few things; I will put you in charge of many things. Come and share your master's happiness!"

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Monday, August 21, 2006

Dreams.

"Hope deferred makes the heart sick; but when dreams come true at last, there is life and joy." Proverbs 13:12


These past few weeks, life has been in quite an uproar. What with the many uncertainties and being caused to uproot and pushed out of my comfort zone.
There's been a lot of talk about dreams and passions which got me thinking bout what I've been dreaming about and thinking bout the things I'm passionate about.
I sometimes think i'm rather like an erratic comet. Having no fixed course. But rather just zooming across the plane seemingly with purpose, but in truth hopelessly lost.

We've all had dreams as we were growing up. I've dreamt about becoming a graphic designer. I wanted to be a writer. I've dreamt about going to far reaches of some unexplored terrain. I wanted to be Indiana Jones's side-kick. I've dreamt about being involved in missions. I want to go full time. I've dreamt about being a dancer, a musician even. And at one point a fireman and a nurse! How some of those dreams seem absurd right now! But a lot of them still possible.

I want to have my own gallery show someday.
I want to have a book published someday.
I want to see my designs up in places someday.
I want to have articles published someday.
I want to know that i've lived my life and not just existed. I'm not here to fill space.

I've realised that if you wait and just work on what you're passionate about. If you're just patient enough to pray and hold on to that dream, The Big Guy gives you your heart's desires.

I'm glad for friends around me who share my passions. I know we've crossed paths for a reason. I know you guys are in my life to make it more exciting. We spur each other on cause we wanna see the other walking in line with his/her destiny.

I thank God for dreams and visions and the ability and see them through. I thank God for instilling such passions into our hearts and for always igniting that spark to keep the flames rising.

I've had articles published. Online and offline.
My designs are currently displayed in the biggest Malaysian Hypermart, situated in Subang.
And i'm working on a project which is very close to heart. Although i might not see results today or tomorrow but i guess i enjoy this 'syiok sendiri' project which keeps me hopeful and excited about what tommorow holds.

To the dancer, the photographer, the singer, the teacher, the writer, the leader, the designer, the musician, the rock star, the artist, hold on to those dreams aight. We'll actualize it.

disconnected

I don't think i'm a very vocal person.
Neither do i appear approachable.
I'm sorry if I've come off as intimidating at times.
No i ain't stuck up.
I am labeled as anti social and aloof.
I'm sorry if i've seemed uncaring.
It takes me awhile to warm up.
I stand in corners so i can evaluate.
I might not say much but I listen a whole lot.
I'm sorry i ain't no Ms. Socialite.
People tire me.
But I am trying.
Just don't judge me.
I'm NOT emo.
I'm just pensive.
Not morbid, but just contemplative in a good way. ( i think )

Thursday, August 17, 2006

Dear You...

Dear you,
I had a good evening with you!
you're my soul sista! I'm glad I've got you!
I think we have telepathic abilities. hehe.
Unleash the mayhem!!!

Dear you,
Thank you for being my Happy Pill!~
I really thank God for our Digi - Maxis transmissions.
Helps me know someone out there gives a rip.
And yes, friendship does double our joy and divide our grief.

Dear you,
I'm thrilled to have found a fellow self-proclaimed writer.
I really appreciate your encouragement and I believe in your dreams.
Today I shall try to 'curi tulang' less and work more.
And not send you so many links that would distract you from work as well.
Haha.
Yeah right!

Dear you,
Our roles are somewhat reversed now. You're the strong one and I've become weak.
I really miss hanging out with you.
Thank you for the pool session.
And i really appreciate our talk.
Well you were doing all the talking and i was listening. heh.
You've helped put things in perspective.
I'm so proud of you.
You've grown so much and you inspire me.

Tuesday, August 15, 2006

Awesome Testimony

I just wanted to share one testimony from a friend which really touched me.

But before that be warned that it's not for people who like to play Judge and who fear that which is out of the ordinary.

As some wise person once said
"Those that matter don't mind, and those that mind, don't matter"

Be Blessed~

~Click~

Sunday, August 13, 2006

Convo 2006

I walked thru the same familiar grounds yet they seemed different to me. The air had a tinge of sweetnes about it. The smell of new beginnings. It felt like Alpha all over again. Only not.

I do not remember the corridors and pathways as how i used to remember them. Buzzing with excitement and full of hopefullness. It always felt like i was gonna run smack into something new at every corner. Today as i stood at the central plaza, and as i walked through the FCM building, there was this sense of appreciation that washed over me. The walls were nodding in approvement.

Of course there's all the people who kinda help you fill in your puzzle. I'm glad i bumped into you today. What we went through wouldn't be something I would wanna go through again. Although I have thought about it many many times. But I do still think you're a great person and i pray you're happy. I thank you for making me a bigger person.

I did wish again as i did last year that i had extended my time at MMU. I wished i'd
graduated this year instead of last year. And i wished i'd been able to retake some subjects and score better in others. I was more excited bout this convo than i was at my own. I took more pictures this convo than i did at mine. I didn't even wanna go to my convocation! But all in all i'm glad i've let go of that part of life. I'm glad i've moved on and grown. Or i wouldn't have had been able to encourage or share the experience of being jobless and being lost and being stuck in between.

You guys who've just graduated, I welcome you into a new beginning. I pray than it will be one where you guys will learn to live and not just exist. Let your hearts not be discouraged by the many rejections or ill treatment from your superiors. I'm sure The Big Guy has a paticular place He wants you to be at and his "placement" is always perfect.

For those of you who are still at Uni, i encourage you to press on. Make the most of what you have and don't walk through those halls blindly. And yeah don't spend your time stoning in the room either. Don't get all caught up in the drama of your lives till you miss the reason why you're placed in MMU. Don't miss that divine appointment He's set you up for.

Convo 2006

I walked thru the same familiar grounds yet they seemed different to me. The air had a tinge of sweetnes about it. The smell of new beginnings. It felt like Alpha all over again. Only not.

I do not remember the corridors and pathways as how i used to remember them. Buzzing with excitement and full of hopefullness. It always felt like i was gonna run smack into something new at every corner. Today as i stood at the central plaza, and as i walked through the FCM building, there was this sense of appreciation that washed over me. The walls were nodding in approvement.

Of course there's all the people who kinda help you fill in your puzzle. I'm glad i bumped into you today. What we went through wouldn't be something I would wanna go through again. Although I have thought about it many many times. But I do still think you're a great person and i pray you're happy. I thank you for making me a bigger person.

I did wish again as i did last year that i had extended my time at MMU. I wished i'd
graduated this year instead of last year. And i wished i'd been able to retake some subjects and score better in others. I was more excited bout this convo than i was at my own. I took more pictures this convo than i did at mine. I didn't even wanna go to my convocation! But all in all i'm glad i've let go of that part of life. I'm glad i've moved on and grown. Or i wouldn't have had been able to encourage or share the experience of being jobless and being lost and being stuck in between.

You guys who've just graduated, I welcome you into a new beginning. I pray than it will be one where you guys will learn to live and not just exist. Let your hearts not be discouraged by the many rejections or ill treatment from your superiors. I'm sure The Big Guy has a paticular place He wants you to be at and his "placement" is always perfect.

For those of you who are still at Uni, i encourage you to press on. Make the most of what you have and don't walk through those halls blindly. And yeah don't spend your time stoning in the room either. Don't get all caught up in the drama of your lives till you miss the reason why you're placed in MMU. Don't miss that divine appointment He's set you up for.

Friday, August 11, 2006

I love Steph. She keeps me entertained at the office.

spirit_of_the_doll: men........pah!
spirit_of_the_doll: men should be locked in cages...only used to reproduce more women...and occasionally to take out the garbage
spirit_of_the_doll: and perform manual labour, like building shopping malls

mel: u know i'm gonna blog bout this right?
spirit_of_the_doll: sigh..beware of bloggers
spirit_of_the_doll: nowadays you can throw a stone at 3 people, and chances are, you'll always hit the one who blogs

Thursday, August 10, 2006

My brother's down with chicken pox!!!!
BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!
well at least he gets like 2 weeks off!
He's banned from the Flying Academy for now.
I wish i'd gotten the spots too.
i wanna go homeeeeeeeee.
i wanna stay in bed and get pampered.
:(

On a different note, Rachel's back!!!!!
wohooooo!!!
=D
*skip skip*
zippedy doo dah!!!

Monday, August 07, 2006

moving on

Its about that time of the year where i sit and reflect and re evaluate all the things that i've done or gonme through this year. There's four more month's before the year ends! Time's moving so fast i've hardly been able to sit down and just breathe. Decisions to make, places to go, things to do, people to meet. We often get all caught up in the whirlwind of everything that we fail to stop and get our bearings right.

I probrably am not the same person i was when i first started out the year. Time changes you. Situations and things that happen sort of mould you as you go along. This is where i bring out my Promises for 2006 and look at what i've managed to accomplish and to see how far i've gone.

Promises for 2006

Family
- to maintain and improve the bond we’ve built over the past year
- to call each member of my family at least once a week
- to spend time at home when I’m back in Penang.
- to be there for my sister
- to pray for the salvation of everyone. That we would have freedom of worship at home and be led to the right church.

Spiritual
- really pray for people when I say I’m going to
- read the Bible daily
- wake up early each morning and spend time with The Big Guy.
- to walk with Him and not settle for less or compromise in my faith.

Social
- quit the old lifestyle
- build new relationships and maintain the old ones
- be accountable
- to maintain the relationship I have with my MMU family and to grow and sharpen each other.

Ministry
- be committed to Worship ministry at church
- dedicate time for Home Cell, Crossroads, dance
- to improve on playing the guitar for Crossroads and Sunday Kidz Church
- be able to lead Crossroads to flow with the vision of the church

Personal
- don’t sell yourself short
- Blog with a purpose
- write non- emo stuff
- One design a day
- practicing spiritual, moral, ethical, and sexual purity.

Physical
- Religiously take my vitamins
- to drink only water or fruit juices when I eat out.
- Work out daily (weights/swimming/pilates)
- eat healthy

Work
- to not work on Weekends
- to master Flash and be able to design websites
- To not “ular” at work and concentrate on designing and giving input to the company.

Saturday, August 05, 2006

Cosmic Funk Express

I'm still high from yesterday's evening at the Sunrise Jazz Festival. Was a really really good evening just chilling with the Melaka peeps and enjoying a spectacular performance by Cosmic Funk Express. It was really really sad to hear that that would be their last show but no worries, you can still catch Alda and Alex as they team up with other bands around, like Broken Scar. And well if you wanna catch Zack, there's always YouTube!!

I think their set on Friday was really awesome. Good crowd as well, and what made it even better was the company I was with! Was really great that the whole gang from Melaka came down and we got to chill for a bit. Kudos to the two Special Olympic participants, Wayne & Tim. We should YouTube that video!!
Jason, was great catching up with you! Glad you had a great time. See, now you really have to come up for Covo weekend as well. We should totally do that again! And perhaps the next time you guys come up to KL we'll opt for a better place for supper. Eating by the dumpster at Murni was just unbecoming!







Wednesday, August 02, 2006

so true



picture from www.threadless.com

Tuesday, August 01, 2006

Routine

Every morning, I wake up, work out, do my Quiet Time, drink a bottle of water, and then take an extremely long shower.
Despite waking up at 7.30am, i'm still always late for work which starts at 10am.
Something's just not right.

I usually take ages to finish my breakfast which would be from the time i get in to work till about lunch time. And then there's coffee. Yes i bring my own Thermos of coffee to work. Which i happily sip throught the morning.

But the past week, I've slowed down a whole lot more. You see i've been skipping the coffee part. Some sort of a caffeine fast you might say. It's just messing up my routine.

I wake up thinking bout coffee and i come in to work looking for my Thermos but its filled with Milo instead. (healthier apparently)

*sigh* Heroin users aren't the only ones who go through withdrawals.

I've downgraded to Herb Tea instead. Chamomile. CAFFEINE FREE! *groan*