Letter from God

I've been reading the One-Minute Writer and someone sent in this piece which i thought was pretty cool.

One-Minute Writing of the Day:
Writer: davidseven

My blessed child,
I've been thinking about it, and have decided that you've had enough confusion and consternation in your life.

So from today, I shall be answering all your questions directly, and audibly, and using small words so you can understand me.

Signed,
GOD